2006

I’ve reached the end of my rope — it’s Saturday.

God won’t show that kind of mercy, we’ve got to do it all ourselves these days.

It’s 3:31 and easier said than done. Lucy’s have gone up a dime which is outrageous yet we all pay it.

This is the book 

I’m writing in colored pencils that GOT

tossed to me or at me, accusatorily, so naturally I felt I MUST defend the honor of these pencils so I tossed the 99 cent store case coz I saw a spider hanging out (they like to bite my lip but only on one side so it looks like bad collagen) and I wanted to suddenly be able to draw. Just like I often suddenly want to be able to go onstage with the Rolling Stones and pull off a Tina Turner but to follow up on such metaphors would be farcical miss the point et cetera 
Frankly I don’t care that much about it 
So that leaves the metaphor. Which is actually in the strands of DNA

and I have loads of that metaphorical understanding which is pretty much like finally accepting you have asberger syndrome when they decide it no longer exists.

Or something like that. See simile.

And I guess 

that I just don’t know 

I wish that 

I was born a thousand years ago

Happiness

Never mind me ‘cause I’ve been dead
Out of my body, been out of my head
Never mind the songs they hum
Don’t want to sing along with nothin’ that I said
Let him bring you happiness, happiness
It’s hard to come by, I confess
I’m better at this than happiness,
If you find it, share it with the rest of us

Never mind the words that came
Out of my mouth when all I could feel was pain
The difference in the two of us
Comes down to the way you rise over things I just put down
Let him bring you happiness, happiness
It’s hard to come by, I confess
I’m better at this than, happiness
If you find it share it with the rest of us, the rest of us

Never mind me ‘cause I’ve been dead
Out of my body, been out of my head
Never mind the curse of war
Proud like a badge that just don’t shine no more
Let him bring you happiness, happiness
Hard to come by, I confess
I’m better at this than happiness,
If you find it, share it with the rest of us

Songwriters: AMY RIGBY, BILL DEMAIN

Screen Shot 2015-07-23 at 9.07.35 AM

Make 

the naked ape

What does that mean to you

To me a torn up cover

Of a book I avoided 

For britannica 

And escaping 

The dark side

Visible 



  Van Gogh

Starry starry Gauguin 

What started as a game 

soon became a well-honed (or was it heeled? She wasn’t sure🌰, it didn’t matter that she was sure of, now it was 

Just a matter of getting out the door in time to make the code 

Deadline

Dead Kennedy waitress clue, the nostalgia made her feel more alive than she had in years and she was making money without having to — the proverbial 🐯whore herself out to make ends meet. Not anymore she thought smugly walking across the empty wide cross walk bearing intersection with the light when a mustang shouting chollos ran the light, careened right into Sara Latham, as she dreamed a little dream of you.

   
 Nelly Bly reporter

She was my antihero 

The heroine not heroin

Not even ruby skippers

Slippers bluebells or day trippers 

No that honorary joy has yet to be seen

Sometimes a great notion

Look homeward angel

The whiteness of bones

Something I have to write 

The awakening

I had a fever probably a subliminal sexual awakening while reading madam Bogarde notary Bovary

   

   The images our mothers gave us
Were mixed messages at best

 And if you were lucky enough to be the Jon snow of a forgotten generic x files REM VU U2 MTV WTF forgotten generation 

But not for long

She’s tense. She’s had to sleep with the publisher for way too long. The book is suffering🐹. She’s boozing.
Nathanial Malbini is scheduled to show up at the outside patio of their favorite Parisian cafe in the shithole they call home on Normal Ave where junkies were in control for a while and it was almost like a hippie veggie omelette Berkeley commune arrangement tiki Ravens til Courtney love came to town
   
   You know you want it
So you start to need it

When you need it

You get it

TO BE CONTINUED 

NOVELLA :75